Physios: The Truth

Witch is wondering....

Physiotherapists. I went to see one last night.

I'm amazed they are allowed to do some of the things they do, things that in ordinary life would surely be illegal. What's more, we pay them for it. If I went out on a Friday night, got completely bladdered and caused someone the amount of pain that the physio caused me yesterday, I'd be in trouble with the law.

She's very nice, Briony. Pretty, petite, friendly, unassuming. That type. You'd never know that underneath it all she was an evil sadist.

I was a little apprehensive at first; after all, I've had physio before. I know their game. I was expecting pain.

Even so, she lured me into a false sense of security. All smiles and chat.
"So, are you excited about Sister Act?" she enthused as I was removing my clothes.
"Totally," I said, instantly relaxing. "It's going to be good. Are you coming to see it?"
"Defo," she smiled. "If you'd just like to get up on the bed, onto your side. That's it."
She lay her hands on my knee gently. I winced.
"That's sore there?"
I nodded.
"What about here?"
"That's not so bad."
"Good. I'm just going to loosen it up around here-" she plunged her elbow into my thigh with all the weight of her body.

I let out a noise that was hauntingly inhuman.

"So, you open in May?" she continued, as if she had simply offered me a cup of tea and not nearly just snapped my femur.

It was hairdresser chit-chat - flimsy, superficial, certainly not worthy of the agony I was in. We should have been discussing the plight of the political prisoner, or corporate globalisation. Something with a bit more weight; at any rate, something meatier than my thigh, which was was getting a pounding.

"Uh...I don't know," I faltered, fighting the urge to vomit as she ran the elbow down towards my knee. The pain had made me forget everything I ever knew, incuding my name, address and which production I was in.
"Should be fun," she said sunnily, pummelling my left butt cheek Tyson-style. "It's one of my favourite films. I'm literally there. As soon as you open."
I nade a non-descript "Hmmn-mmn", the pain masquerading as nonchalant agreement.

I think that's what annoys me the most. I pretend I'm alright with the torture, I go along with it all. I make it okay for them to carry on their cruel, sadistic practices.

Actually, the knee's feeling a bit better now....